2013-05-01
Explanation
This comic features a genie-like figure offering a man three wishes, specifically recommending he use them to change bad decisions from his past. The man refuses with a common philosophical platitude: "Each mistake is a lesson. Each fall is a chance to stand up higher. Without those embarrassments and accidents, I wouldn't be the man I am today." The genie is incredulous, responding "Are you fucking nuts?" and pointing out the logical flaw: "What are the odds that all that is true? By that logic, you'd be better off removing the smart stuff you did!"
The genie then makes the practical argument that by changing just a couple of days in the man's past, almost every future life path would improve in all the ways he finds meaningful, without significantly altering his personality. He accuses mortals of having "Stockholm syndrome with your own histories." Finally he pushes: "Isn't there something you would change? Something from around age 17 or so?" The man relents and admits he wishes he hadn't asked a girl out through a Taco Bell drive-thru, and the genie gratefully accepts.
The comic is a sharp takedown of the popular self-help notion that we should never regret our past because "everything happens for a reason." The genie's counterargument is genuinely compelling: the idea that every single mistake was necessary to make you who you are today is statistically absurd, and clinging to that belief is just a coping mechanism to avoid the discomfort of acknowledging that some of your decisions were simply bad. The final joke grounds the philosophical argument in an endearingly specific and embarrassing teenage memory.