2013-05-25
Explanation
A woman tells her partner, "Every time you tell me you love me, I die a little." The man reacts with shock ("Oh my God"), but she quickly explains that she means it literally: technically, while he is saying "I love you," about a million cells in her body die. She then extends the logic: "So, I also die a little inside when I say 'I love you' to you." Taking the biological analogy further, she adds with a grin, "And when we make love, I die a lot" -- since more time means more cell death.
The man, processing this, says: "I know that last one was a compliment, but I still feel sad." She then tries to reassure him with: "Well, I don't die that much" -- which is meant as comfort but actually implies the sex doesn't last very long, making the situation even more awkward.
The joke plays on the romantic cliche "I die a little inside" by taking it completely literally through biology. The humor escalates as each attempt to be sweet or reassuring backfires. The final line is a classic Weinersmith double-edged compliment, where the woman accidentally insults the man's sexual stamina while trying to make him feel better.
The votey panel shows a mathematical calculation: (1 sex / 120 seconds) times (1 second / 1e6 cell deaths) = 1 sex / 1.2e8 cell deaths. This works out the actual number of cells that die during a two-minute sexual encounter (120 million), adding a hilariously precise scientific coda to the joke and further confirming the brevity implied by the punchline.