move
Explanation
In this comic, an older man (likely a professor or mentor figure) asks another character, "Grandpa, how do you move so good with the ladies?" The grandfather reveals what he claims is "the secret number one ultimate best move." When pressed, he says "Yes" and then delivers an elaborate, over-the-top romantic scenario: "Take off her bra with one hand, then be at a sunrise point in Big Sur when Mars, Venus, and Jupiter are aligned. You've experienced enough to relax but have enough to be surprised. Then you make eye contact superficially, but your thoughts coalesce into a single moment, got it? Permanent, that you paradoxically think is both perfect in both of your memories forever."
He then reveals "that's the number two move" — implying the actual number one move is even more absurdly specific and impossible.
The joke operates on multiple levels. First, it satirizes the common trope in men's magazines and pickup-artist culture of reducing romance to a set of numbered "moves" or techniques. Second, the grandfather's "move" is so impossibly specific and romanticized — requiring planetary alignment, a particular emotional state, and a paradoxically perfect mutual memory — that it parodies the unrealistic expectations people set for romantic encounters. The punchline that this ludicrously elaborate scenario is only the second best move implies the "number one move" must be even more impossibly contrived, highlighting the absurdity of ranking romantic experiences. The caption "SHOCKER" functions as dry sarcasm, and one of the onlookers appears amusingly unimpressed, reinforcing the comedic deflation.