the-new-thing
Explanation
The Joke
A tech executive is on stage giving a product announcement. He declares: "Science and technology have reached their limit! We can no longer keep releasing slightly improved phones year after year." But then he adds: "Fortunately, you don't use most of the features anyway."
His solution: "From now on, each year we will generate a random agglomeration of carbon, plastic, and silicon." He introduces "the sPan quasi-telephone" -- which he describes as "a beveled something and a tapered thingy." An audience member remarks: "Bold choice this year. Quite a statement."
The Humor
The comic satirizes the annual cycle of smartphone releases, where each new model offers only marginal improvements over the last. The joke takes this to its logical extreme: if the improvements are so incremental that consumers barely notice them, why not just release a random lump of materials instead? The audience's enthusiastic reception of the shapeless object as a "bold choice" and "quite a statement" skewers the way tech consumers and media treat minor design changes as revolutionary innovations. The made-up product name "sPan quasi-telephone" with its bizarre capitalization parodies real tech product naming conventions. The comic captures the absurdity of planned obsolescence and the consumer culture that sustains it -- people will buy and praise essentially anything as long as it is marketed as new.
References
The comic is a satire of the annual smartphone release cycle, particularly Apple's iPhone announcements (suggested by the presentation style and stage setup), though it applies broadly to the entire consumer electronics industry. The mention of "beveled" edges references actual design terminology used in product marketing. The comic was published in October 2016, during a period of widespread commentary about smartphone innovation reaching a plateau.